When Learning Becomes Another Leash
Everyone online was preaching upskill or up-level to reinvention.
Loud calls made to “stay relevant” and “up-level your brand.”
So, I did what many of us do.
I signed up for a copywriting certification.
It was meant to sharpen my skills, and give me an edge.
And technically, it did. The modules were clear. The coach was credible.
But each time I logged in, something subtle inside me shrank.
I wasn’t expanding, I was performing.
I wasn’t aligning, I was adapting.
Trying to fit into a structure that never asked me what mattered most.
I thought I was investing in myself.
But what I was really doing was trading my deeper knowing
for a prettier version of someone else’s path.
And somewhere between the lessons and the login screens, I heard it.
Quiet but firm:
Your soul doesn’t want a script.
It wants a voice.
Your voice.
The Dangerous Illusion of Career Capital
We’re told to keep building our “career capital” as if we’re machines.
Outdated software in need of patches and upgrades.
But what if the hunger to keep up is just cleverly disguised fear?
What if we’re not broken?
What if we’re just tired of optimizing ourselves for systems that were never built with us in mind?
Midlife women, mothers, makers, quiet revolutionaries, we’re not behind.
Obsolete? Of course not. We’re evolving. We’re remembering.
And that doesn’t come with a digital badge.
You’re not a system to be optimized.
You’re a soul to be awakened.
A Forest Doesn’t Hurry to Bloom
Let’s stop pretending growth always looks like hustle.
Nature teaches us otherwise.
Trees don’t panic into spring. They wait. They root.
They shed what no longer serves.
Upskilling from fear, fear of falling behind, fear of being replaced.
Like planting seeds in poisoned soil, it might bloom for a season. But it won’t nourish you long term.
Upleveling, though? That’s different. It’s not about metrics. It’s about meaning.
It’s asking:
- Is this helping me feel more alive?
- Am I remembering who I really am?
- Am I becoming freer?
If the answer is no—pause.
Learning That Liberates
Let me be clear: I believe in learning.
But not the kind that keeps us hustling for approval.
I believe in the kind that liberates.
That might mean taking a class on intuitive healing.
Or studying permaculture because your soul lights up around soil and seasons.
It could mean learning to say “no” with grace.
Maybe finally exploring trauma-informed practices that help you hold space for others and yourself.
Presence, not performance, is the next frontier of mastery.
You don’t have to be “more valuable” to deserve peace.
You don’t need a certificate to honor your calling.
Shedding Layers to Remember Who I Am
The past three years have taught me more through letting go than through holding on.
I’ve released the belief that my value depends on being seen.
The idea that real wisdom comes without mess or doubt.
I’ve released the pressure to turn my calling into a paycheck just to prove it’s real.
And in that quiet unraveling, something deeper emerged—not a new version of me, but a truer one.
Not a promotion on paper, but a rise in spirit.
Ask the Right Question
Before you click “Enroll” on that next training or webinar, ask:
- Am I moving toward expansion—or escaping discomfort?
- Is this a path to power—or a prettier prison?
- Will this reconnect me with my essence—or further disconnect me?
Because not all learning is growth or all achievement is alignment.
More importantly, not all success is sacred either.
The Gentle Invitation: Root, Don’t Rush
If you’re in a season of stillness, honor it.
But when you feel pulled to slow down, listen.
If you long to learn something that seems “useless” by corporate standards, trust that.
Because the most powerful tools you carry might not be what the market measures.
They might be your intuition or your compassion.
Your capacity to hold paradox and create space.
To bring calm to chaos.
That’s not upskilling. That’s remembering.
You Are the Return on What Matters Most
You’re not running late nor are you in pieces.
You’re not past your prime, you’re awakening.
You’re shedding the noise and finding your way back home.
So, when the world urges you to upgrade your skills, pause.
Ask how you might deepen yourself.
Not your profile or your portfolio.
But the essence beneath it all.
Because your soul doesn’t network in bullet points.
It moves in whispers.
It moves in knowing.
It moves in you.
Resources for Deeper Exploration
- Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Dr. Carol Dweck – explores the difference between fixed and growth mindsets.
- The Soul of Money by Lynne Twist – reframes our relationship with value, worth, and sufficiency.
- The Wild Edge of Sorrow by Francis Weller – helps you explore the depth of emotional intelligence not taught in conventional career paths.
- Resonance by Nancy Duarte – a must-read if you communicate for a living and want to connect soul-to-soul, not just audience-to-audience.
Resource
A shedding tree bathed in light—symbolizing the beauty in releasing what no longer serves in order to return to self. Learn more here.